Lolol....
We tried
1:32am. Hi.
Do you ever have an off day - or week, or month - and then you look around and feel even worse for feeling ungrateful?
My life is exponentially better than it has ever been and yet somedays my *mental illness* has me feeling like it’s the end of the world, so I have been trying really hard to take a step back and appreciate at least one thing in that moment - it’s usually Gatsby. I try and ground myself and remind myself:
you have a job
you have a place to live
you have a child that loves you (Gatsby)
you have a partner that loves you
you’re hot
Life could be worse; in fact life has been worse.
I’ve also realized that I used to have this kind of life distraction - someone to go to and tune out the whole world, which was leading to an ignorance and avoidance of my issues and since losing that, i’ve been sort of forced to live in the now and in real time deal with whatever issue are arising and while it’s never my first instinct to deal with something head on, it is quite refreshing to not have something sitting on your chest.
1:46am: goal for this week - sign up for yoga
going to scroll TikTok till 2am and force myself back to sleep because I have to be up at 5:30am.
xoxo gossip girl